traveling up and down the blind highway

This past week, modern medicine made national news with a genetically altered pig’s kidney transplanted into a 52 year old man. New hope for patients waiting for organs. I wonder if we are looking for a quick fix to our medical problems. Are we spending millions on research and not enough on other medical concerns, such as procuring prescriptions drugs.
Last October, I was told by my endocrinologist that my bones were very brittle. I have had two hip replacements, a pelvic fracture and a wrist/ arm fracture in 5 years. I needed a drug to strengthen my bone density. The problem: the drug “Tymlos” is expensive and not offered by many pharmacies. The search for the steps to obtain this drug has been continuing for over three months.
In January, my doctor wrote a prescription sending it to our local pharmacy. We were informed the drug must be ordered from a special pharmacy. Fine! To date, we have talked to half a dozen people at the drug ordering center. responses included;
” We need a new prescription”
A new prescription has been sent to the pharmacy with the last one good through 2025.
“We need an authorization number for this order.”
We were assured by our provider that they have approved the generic form of this drug.
” There is no file for this patient.”
With the number of calls, there should be a large file of trying to order this drug.
Last week, we thought we had finally made headway. “Yes, I see you can get a starter kit with one dose to check for side effects.”
“Great.”
“You should receive your dosage in 24 to 72 hours.”
That was over a week ago. Calling the center Friday, we were told;
” There is no record of this prescription, We must order another prescription from your doctor.”
So at the end of three months, back to square one. I have two friends with the same condition. They have fallen resulting in several fractures and one closed head injury.
I do applaud the inroads modern medicine has provided, but simplifying the drug distribution may be as important and effect many more patients. The mundane is not showy for news time.
The Wall
Humpty Dumpty walked by a wall.
a slip, a fall, emergency call,
several fractures, broken head
not the same, least he’s not dead!
carolaspot@aol.com March 25, 2024

It started with a poetry workshop. One of the suggested readings was, “Braided Creek.” A book written by Jim Harrison and Ted Kooser , about two poets corresponding poems to each other without identifying the author. This allowed the poems to stand, blend into one book.
I was drawn to this form but I needed another writer to try this. In a meeting, I blurted out:
“Lynda, Do you want to try this?”
After a slight pause, she said yes.
Since both of us are artists as well as poets, we expanded the mail to include a picture, photo or drawing. The poem must be able to fit on a postcard.
Though both of us could use free matter for the blind, we chose to stamp each card to be part of the art. The poems are attached to the postcard with glue or double sided tape. Some of the art is covered with tape for protection.
Now, writing in our third month, I am amazed how this routine has easily become part of my daily schedule.
We have worked through losing friends and family in a brief time. The notes , emails and the poems themselves have given each of us a shared slice of time. Similar to a journal, but with sharing in mind. We carry on.
Our goal is to try for a year. Each time I put my card in the mailbox, I send a prayer with the card. I love the way a thought can blossom into a sharing.
I expanded this card sending to another friend with Alzheimer’s . She can’t write and has to have the card read to her. I hope that she can enjoy the flower photos and the few words to tell her that I am thinking of her.
Only God knows where this will lead. I will hold on for the ride.

Write a card.
Photo attached.
affix the stamp.
lift signal bar.
Delivery placed
In my hands.
In my house,
Art appreciate.
Carolaspot@aol.com

Spring is the time when we set our clocks to spring forward an hour. In the fall, we return to this clock setting. The history of this change can be traced to 1919. During WWI, factories, offices along with other manufacturers, used the longer daylight hours in the war effort. This clock setting practice continues to this day. Arizona and Hawaii are the only states not to use daylight savings time.
As a child, I noted the change by awakening in the dark to get ready for school, My mother sent me to wake each of my brothers. I had to quickly give a back massage before they would wake up. Many spring mornings, I was treated with fog layered streets, casting an eerie glow over buildings.
When I had daylight driving, I had to leave my home as soon as I could see the road. Working longer hours in the summer months, I could write a 40 hour work week on my time card.
Now, with retirement and blind, I don’t notice the difference. I get up when I awaken and go to bed when I am tired. In my world, it is the same. I listen to news announcers complain about getting up early, dragging for days. I shrug and wonder what is all the fuss.
Melatonin not the light change resets my inner clock.

Time Change

Ttick, tock tones the clock.
wind the spring, count the dings.
Dad winds each clock.
Making sure they won’t stop.
Each one, has a voice.
oil workings,
keep parts moist.
Clocks are set to different times,
to allow each chime to shine.
Listen to the chimes at dawn.
I turn over as I yawn.
carolaspot@aol.com
March 11th ,2024

In the pop song, “Good Vibrations”, by the “Beach Boys”. The singer croons about “she is giving me the excitations”. Well, when I opened my new hearing aids, the audiologist assured me that the speach would be sent directly to my aids making the volume louder. What wasn’t mentioned is the voice I hear from my phone is not heard by others in the area. this is great if one is reading a book or a podcast but it can be creepy for others.
For example, I can hear my phone ringing in my ear, without being near my phone. Tapping my hearing aid , will answer the call. I can talk and disconnect by the same method. If I am in a meeting my side of a conversation sounds like this
“Hello”
“Yes, I can be there.”
“Ok, See you then.”
People near me imagine that I am starting to talk to myself for no reason. My husband, though used to these one sided interchanges and still wonders.
The most difficult interchanges are with Siri and going through e mail. My part of the conversation could run like this,
“Read it.”
“Next.”
“Send.”
I try to be in a quiet space with some privacy, like a bathroom stall. If I answer too softely, Siri will ask me to repeat my request. I usually raise my voice to accommodate conversation. I will emerge only to find a person with a puzzled expression.
“Do you need help?”
I want to shout,”Yes, I need to send and retreave my email in peace.”
I am waiting for Alexa, Siri and google to strike up a conversation without me. That will give me excitations,

Is there anyone out there?

Phone ringing.
In my ear beeping.
Tap phone, say hello.
A.I. on the phone.
I sigh , wait my turn.
Wait so long, I forgot what to say.
Carolaspot@aol.com

In the musical,”Guys and Dolls” The character, Adelaide sings a lament about a cold from not being married. Though I am married, I can identify with the misery of the annual winter cold. No matter what I do or take, the illness will run it’s full course.
Many remedies include, vitamin C, herbal tea or whiskey and honey. Nothing seems to help.
When growing up, my mother would put a steamer in the ill child’s bedroom. Near the steam opening was a small indention. This was filled with the infamous Vicks Vapor rub. Soon the whole room would smell a training room for athletes.
Hot lemon and honey mixed with water was offered as a drink. I preferred to take a dose of honey straight from a teaspoon.
We would be offered Vick’s cough drops. The box was kept from year to year, with the drops becoming soft and sticky. They would collect fuzz from the drawer where they were hidden. One of those would cure a child from asking for another.
My grandmother Jenny’s, universal solution to any illness was to give Vernors Ginger Ale. Indifference to a sore throat, she would warm the drink.
Grandpa Al swore snorting salt water into the nose was the best cure for a stuffed up nose. I could never get the courage to try it. I do recall my dad attempting this remedy, with mixed results.
Finally, a hot bath with a long soak was offered before bedtime. Epsom Salts were mixed in the water to relax sore muscles from from coughing. I recall the water had a smooth feel as I splashed in the tub.
With all the advise, I will close that whatever cure you try, remember, improvement will occur in about ten day. Ah-cho!

Blow Away

Blow away
A cold to stay,
Not Mother’s cures I pray.
reading in bed, I’ll stay.
not too gay,
Vick’s smell all day.
carolaspot@aol.com

Tis the season of Church fish fries. Also known as meatless meals, the Friday’s in lent were a time to come together as a parish to share a meal. It became a money making operation for churches and other non-profits, such as Knights of Columbus and Veterans organizations.
For a small price, a person can get a piece or two of fried perch, walleye or cod. The meal may include fries, coleslaw, a roll and butter and a drink of lemonade or coffee. Other menu items could include macaroni and cheese, for the children, a tossed salad, and baked potato. There may be an optional dessert selection donated by parishioners. Like many food items, fish fry’s have raised their prices from 8 dollar meals to 13 to 15 dollar per meal. To allow a lower cost alternative for families, some churches are offering Soup and Salad with a roll and a drink. A choice of several soups and salads may be available.
Different parts of the country may have different items on the menu. In Florida and other parts of the south, French fries were replaced with fried okra. The offered seafood was shrimp. A soup of clam chowder was available.
My mother had several meals she would rotate through the lenten season. There was creamed peas on toast. I would get my creamed peas in a separate bowl with the toast on the side, after I had thrown up the pea mixture on toast.
Home made mac and cheese was a favorite. It was served with a side salad in wooden bowls. The same bowls would be used later for popcorn.
Finally there was homemade pizza with several different veggies. My choice was mushrooms. Occasionally mom baked fish sticks, but not often.
As we grew older, we were expected to fast, eating only one meal or two smaller meals. Coming to the table hungry, we were less picky.
Finally, remember the volunteers that cooked and will clean up after you. The meals are offered hoping to break even. Be generous with your donation.

Fries

A long table,
Paper plate of cooling fries,
A small girl daintily pinches a fry
between her finger and thumb.
Dipping into a cup of ketchup.
She dips again and again.
Till the plate is clean.

carolaspot@aol.com February 19, 2024

When asked what is the most romantic destination, answers may include Hawaii, Cancun or Paris. For my husband and myself, that place is Death Valley, California. It was the destination for our honeymoon.
Three days after Valentine’s Day, we flew to Las Vegas to be married in a small chapel,”Graceland”. Then onto Death Valley. We both loved the desert. Coming from the snowy midwest, we wanted warm, sunny weather.
Death Valley National Park is over 5000 square miles, spanning California and Nevada east of the Sierra Nevadas. We stayed in Nevada, at Furnace Creek. The park includes salt flats, sand dunes, badlands, canyons ,even snow capped mountains. Bad Water basin, is 282 feet below sea level. Fewer than five hundred people live year round in the area, making it a secluded spot.
On our way to Furnace Creek we drove for three hours without seeing another vehicle, except for the burned out ruin of a chassis. I wanted to visit Desert Pupfish Monument located on the way. In the west, distance is reported in driving hours not miles. We did find the parking area for the pupfish. Not another car was there. A metal walkway spanned the opening of underground salt water caverns. Rarely seen except by scuba divers, the spring is protected. We propped the camera to take a selfie of us with the sign and the empty parking lot. twelve years later, while visiting the area with our daughter Ruth, We were able to see the pupfish swimming up the shallow to spawn. The fish are 1 to three inches in length. It is a boney fish silver or tan in color. The males are slightly larger with blue tinges on their gills. They can withstand high temperatures, and the high salt content of the water.
The average rain in the valley is 1.4 inches yearly most of it coming in the fall. Recently, washouts in the canyons of the area have closed several roads.
On our first visit, the weather was dry and warm. On our second trip in 2004, we were caught in a sudden torrent , causing gullies to flood. We drove up into the canyons on narrow roads. The wind blew hard, causing my hair to stand up and the car to rock.
Other natural wonders are a salt deposit area with many holes and divots in the ground. Bad Water Basin, is 282 feet below sea level. It is considered one of the hottest places in the country. It holds the record for the highest temperature of of 134 degrees. The average temperature runs about 91 degrees.
Near the mountains, the weather is more temperate. The weather forecast calls for cool, dry weather in that area.
One of the most colorful areas in the valley is Artist’s palette. The mineral deposits in the cliffs give the rocks hues of blues, purples and pinks. Low sun can highlight the colors in the cliffs.
Scottie’s Castle is a ranch built by Albert Johnson a millionaire from Chicago. He befriended Walter Scot, a local gold miner and story teller. Mr Johnson built an apartment for he and his wife to use and stay when visiting the ranch. In exchange, visitors were told that Scottie owned he ranch and a a hidden gold mine that funded his lifestyle.
The ranch is now part of the Death Valley National Park.
When asked to compare the Grand Canyon to Death Valley, a visitor commented, “the Grand Canyon is immense with vistas and wildlife, but Death Valley has a spiritual component in the desert landscapes,
It is a popular destination for landscape photography.
I choose Death Valley for my Valentine’s destination.

Death Valley

Found in the desert between California and west of the mountains
It is a dry, rugged terrain.
It’s name derived from a group of gold seeking miners that starved in the mountains in 1849, starved
on their way to join the gold rush.
Still today, it is an isolated landscape.
Filled with quiet spiritual beauty.
carolaspot@aol.com February 12, 2024

When people talk about the winter break, they usually are referring to a break from school or work. This year, I see a different break. The reprieve from a harsh winter.
Here in the midwest, we start to see the signs of spring in March. This year, February is the month of change.
The white lenten rose plants have continued to bloom all winter. The rose tinted buds of the helleborus a later bloomer, are producing small pink buds.
Myrtle has stayed green and lush. Deer have continued to feed on the new growth by digging under the snow to find the plant as it appears.
Even the flowering bulbs of the snow drops have started to put out leaves a month ahead of schedule.
Additionally, The shoreline of Lake Michigan is free of ice. The lake is usually ice bound into March. Punxsutawney Phil’s prediction of an early spring is proving true.
Global warming is a fact, not a myth.
Our area of the country is not the only area seeing weather changes. There have been torrential rains in Washington and Oregon. More than five inches of rain have fallen in the past week in Portland. The average yearly rainfall is 48 inches.
Texas, has dealt with a long period of dry, hot weather. In College Station, near Houston, the heat record was recorded at 112 degrees. The Dakota’s, midwest and the south had long periods of extreme heat, paired with little rainfall.
Warming of the surface of oceans have increased the intensity and frequency of hurricanes. The increased temperatures in shallow water areas, such the Golf of Mexico and near the Florida Keys, have caused destruction of plant and fish life.
So before you take too much delight in the change in winter, consider if this a variation or a trend? What can each of us do to make a smaller footprint in the water and land? We have one earth and she is sending out an alarm.

No bees,
no ants,
fewer birds,
Just some pests
butterflies gone
no bats on wing
who’s next
feel the sting

One of the oldest and strangest holidays is Ground Hog Day. First observed in the 16th century, by German speaking people. In 1887 the Pennsylvania Dutch believed in the weather predication ability of the ground hog. The ground hog or wood chuck would emerge from hibernation on the same day, yearly. If he saw his shadow, he would return to his burrow and there would be 6 more weeks of winter.
In 1887, Punxsutawney a Indian name meaning sand flies, was a summer encampment that became the center of ground hog activities.
Punxsutawney after the Indian name for this area in Pennsylvania, is translated as winged fleas. The terrain the animals prefer contains bushes and woods. With clear sights to see other approaching animals. The ground hog will protect his territory from other males to care for the new babies.
The ground hog, known as Phil made his debut over 130 years ago. Though the lifespan of a ground hog 14 years, Punxsutawney has lived for over 130 years.
Since the movie ,”Ground Hog Day,” many municipalities have celebrated this day to escape from the doldrums of winter.
In addition to the observing of the ground hog prediction of winter’s length. A pancake breakfasts featuring the pancakes in the shape of the ground hog with banana slices for ears, almond eyes and chocolate pieces with marshmallows decorating the backs is offered.
Celebrations, can include parades led by a human dressed as the ground hog. Skits are popular where the snow and ground hog are blown off the stage by a strong spring wind. Crafts featuring pop up ground hogs are offered for children to make.
Ground hogs, also known as whistle pigs or woodchucks are a type of ground squirrel. They prefer low lands near bushes and edges of woodlands. The name Whistle Pig comes from the high pitch sound a ground hog will produce when protecting his territory.
The ground hog is not a good predictor of the weather. He have been correct about 40 percent of the time. If he was weather reporter, he would be out of a job.
Other activities have included a Ground Hog marathon, and nature walks.
Whatever way you choose to mark this day, know that spring is only four to six weeks away. Looking forward to the green shoots of wild grasses and mint plants that ground hogs savor.

Indications of Spring

Green shoots
in sunny spot
long stem reaching to light
bell shaped flowers along stems
dew drops

Carolaspot@aol.com January 29, 2024
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In the past month, We have lost four friends. Knowing as we age, we will experience this loss more. I thought back to deaths in John’s and my own families.
John’s Dad, Albert was the first to die. He had emphysema and kidney damage. It was a long degenerative condition. He had many bouts of breathing difficulties. He used oxygen .
John’s last memory of his Dad was during one of these breathing bouts.
“Dad, Make up your mind. Do you need to go to the hospital? I have to go and milk the cows.”
Dad decided to go to the hospital. John called his mom, Helen to relate the news.
Mom, I took Dad to the hospital. “He didn’t look good, you better come home.”
When Helen arrived at the hospital, Dad was sitting in bed and talking.
“I need a pair of slippers.”
Helen went to buy a pair. Upon returning, she found that he had died.
My Mom, Rita, had a heart attack at home. When she was admitted to the hospital, they found her lung capacity was limited. She slowly deteriorated over the next year.
Before Mother’s Day, all of the children decided to visit her that weekend. Rita rallied and was able to have lively conversations with each of us. Her mouth and tongue were covered with ulcers, making it painful to eat or drink. Mom asked me to hold the cup for her. She was aware and batted my hand aside as I spilled water on her night gown.
My brother Mike was the best at giving her water. He spoke softly and was careful not to touch her sore lips.
We returned the next day to find that Mom had passed just before we arrived. She was sitting watching TV with Dad.
“Bruce, I really love you.”
Dad watching the news replied,
“I love you too dear.” She slipped from this world before the sports report.
Sadly my brother Mike died several years ago after a battle with stomach cancer. He had many bouts of chemo before he succumbed.
John’s Mon, Helen had hospice for bladder cancer. She was able to stay with us until the last month of her life. She had made arrangements to have care in an assisted living center. Once there, she had a quick decline, except for the phone conversation with her son Gene.
“Gene, when are you coming to visit?”
“Mom, I am in Roseville, you are in Grand Rapids, it is too long of a trip.”
After that call, Helen, died shortly after Christmas. She was at peace the last time we visited her.
My Dad was able to stay in his home with help from my brother Brian and his family. Living next door to him, they were able to keep a close watch on him.
Dad had a growth or pocket in his throat. This made it difficult to swallow. He ate less and drank Ensure and other liquids . He was weak and fell, after that he had to have help to stand, walk and use the bathroom. Brian would sleep on the floor in his room to be available to help him in the night.
He was taken to the hospital where he soon died watching the sunrise from his bed.
We refer to a “good death.” We can prepare for death by living each day well. Finding people and tasks that keep us engaged and involved. Prayer and meditation is a part of my daily routine. As one person commented,
Live each day as if it is your last, for someday it will be.”
Live with purpose, die well and at peace.
Carolaspot@aol.com
January 22, 2024

Going Home

walks through shadows
path cleared to welcome
travelers